Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Dating Culture?

I like to spend some time on the Yahoo Answers. Mostly I answer questions in the humanities section, but every once in a while I move into the family and relationships section, just to see if there's anything interesting. It also lets me see what the future will be like, and let me tell you, it isn't pretty. For example, here are a couple of the questions posted this evening:
im dating a fifth grade boy is that ok? btw is it ok if i like another guy? i still love the guy im with but i like the other dude?is that ok?

The asker is a sixth grader. An eleven year old is dating a ten year old, and someone, somewhere, thinks this is acceptable or cute. Not only dating, but she wants to date someone else as well! The responders (so far) are about evenly divided between "you're too young to date/be in love" and "it's fine, you're in love". The "it's fine" crowd is what has me a tad bit worried. Says one responder,
She may not know what love is.
But she's old enough to be dating.
You guys need to stop saying "omg you're too young wait til you're 16!" and stuff like that.
Kids start dating from as young as 3rd and 4th grade now a days.
Get over it.
It's insane but it'll be okay...

Third and fourth grade? Please take yourself out of the gene pool. The rest look like other sixth graders who basically cheer her on, or tell her to find a guy her own age (because I guess that one year makes all the difference). [/sarcasm]
Another question I read:
Is it bad that a friend of mine can't get a girlfriend. He's 15,in 10th grade. He has never really kissed a girl. Do you think it's bad..? He's always at home and never really goes out with friends..

So, by fifteen (or roundabout highschool age) we're expected to have already started making out? I know I'm not the only person disturbed by this. What I don't understand is how parents let it get this way. Dating used to be not so different from courtship. Meaning, the point of dating was to find the person you would marry. Now it seems to be just another pointless, aimless activity. Well, unless you consider hooking-up or shacking-up to be worthy goals. In fact, if you were to say in mixed company, "I'm looking for a spouse" people would probably think you were a little off. If you take marriage out of the equation, what is the point of dating? Companionship? You can get that from your friends. That pretty much narrows it down to...physical pleasure. And I don't want to hear about how dating amongst such young kids couldn't lead to that, because we all know that's a lie.

We've gotten to a point where we no longer differentiate between adult and child activities*, and it's not doing anyone any good. Actually, it seems like there's almost been a total role reversal, where teenagers are expected to drink and be crazy, but when parents have so much as a glass of wine they're vilified for being irresponsible.

I know I'm hopelessly old fashioned, but is it too much to ask to let children be children? It's bad enough that the hook-up, don't-ever-let-yourself-be-unattached culture has infiltrated high schools, but we have to draw a line somewhere.

*I think the creation of 'teenagers' is partly to blame for this.

It's not about being single...

...and it's not particularly blissful, or happy at all, but it's still important.

Breed Specific Legislation (BSL) is pointless, as it is based on lies and junk science. Above all, it is cruel and inhumane. I'm not going to rehash all the facts to back this up right now, if you're interested in the truth please don't wait for it to be spoon-fed to you (and that applies to all subjects, not just BSL). If you can, consider fostering for a local rescue; if you can't, please make a donation to one so they can continue their work. Also, find out where your state stands on the issue, and what you can do to end this bigotry.

Pit Bull Rescue Center
Gulf Coast Doberman Rescue

Monday, December 29, 2008

Reality Check

Pearl's post reminded me of a conversation I saw on Trading Spouses (don't judge me). A Ft. Lauderdale mom had switched with a Wisconsin* farm mom. The farm family had a chicken coop, and one day the Florida mom happened to look in and see a dead chicken. She ran to tell the kids (17 year old girl, teenage boy) that one of the chickens was sick and someone needed to do something. The girl poked her head in and looked for a second, and flatly stated, "It's dead." The FL mom was greatly upset by this, refused to believe it, and made the girl pick it up, carry it to the garage, and lay it on the cool floor with a fan blowing on it because, "He's just overheated." After a few minutes of this, she was still insisting it was alive and she even said she could feel a pulse. Once again, the girl felt for a pulse and, just as flatly, stated, "Yeah. It's dead." FL mom was finally forced to accept the chicken wasn't making a comeback, which is when she wanted to have a funeral for the thing (I don't know if they ever did; I doubt it.)

Later, in those 'alone with the camera' interviews they do, the FL mom explained that the chicken had probably died of the heat because it wasn't used to heat like she is, being from Florida and living at the beach as she does. The girl expressed her exasperation with the woman, because early after arriving the FL mom had talk about making a fancy chicken-based dish for the family. Did she not, the girl asked, realize they would have had to kill one of their chickens anyway for her to make the meal?

Two (related) things struck me about the situation: 1) the FL mom's arrogance and 2) her ignorance of nature and where food comes from. Presumably, the chicken had lived its whole life on this farm, experiencing the same four seasons every year. Meaning, the chicken wasn't suddenly overwhelmed by the heat and just couldn't stand it because it hadn't been exposed to a Florida heat. Secondly, the mom sounds like one of those people who thinks meat is produced in a factory, already plastic wrapped and ready for cooking. It seems to be a common misconception, considering how many meat-eaters think hunting for food is immoral. It reminds me of the scene in a Montgomery Troy music video, where the guy is driving through town with a deer strapped to his hood. He gets stopped at a red light, next to an indoor/outdoor cafe, where the patrons are horrified to see his kill...right up until their juicy, medium rare steaks are brought out.

Humans are omnivores. Animals die so we can eat. Deal with it. No one is saying you have to go out and kill your own food, we would just appreciate it if you had a rudimentary understanding of the real circle of life**.

And another thing: if you're against the use of leather or fur products, you should probably stop eating meat as well. Do you think slaughter houses just throw the skins out when they're done? Of course not, they sell them to companies who produce leather and fur goods (if they don't have their own business on the side).

I'm glad I could get that off my chest. I have been chastised by people for a pair of gloves I own (rabbit fur-lined leather), and I'm a little tired of having to explain to people that if they eat steak or rabbit, they helped make my gloves.

*I think it was Wisconsin, but it could have been a different northern/midwest state.
**Not the fake Disney one, where lions eat grubs and are best friends with walking pork chops.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Saturday, December 6, 2008

To address an issue that some men seem to suffer from in making assumptions about single women!

From Singularly Blissful Kate's log:

When a single female who is attractive is single by choice and happy about it, men make the assumption that she is a lesbian. Well I’m here to clear that little misunderstanding right up and fast. I personally believe a man who desires a female that is attractive and finds her to impossible to have will make the undignified assumption that she is a lesbian in order to make himself feel more comfortable about his masculinity! There I’ve said it, and another thing, just because a girl is happy being single, does not mean she will choose to ignore every single man out there on the face of the planet, it just means she is wiser in her decisions about choosing a mate that will not exhaust, use, or abuse her. A single female that is NOT desperate, will not do something stupid and desperate and go falling for the first available attractive man calling.
I find that my mind is clearer in making a decision for life when I am happy, content , and confident in myself, and my singleness.

Arrrr, the pirate hath spoken!

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Because she's evil, that's why.

Angela: what happened to all the paragraphs I added to your post?
Angela: *yanking hair*
Angela: AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kate: what?
Kate: lol, it did'nt work in the email i guess
Angela: ack
Angela: I'll fix it
Kate: LOL
Kate: nothing like making you go insane
Kate: hahahahaha
Kate: i'm talented at that
Kate: arrrrrrrrrr
Kate: i'm a pirate i don't have to have good grammer
Angela: oh yes you do
Angela: you do understand the difference between capitalization in English and capitalization in German, right?
Angela: because you just randomly capitalize words
Kate: LOL
Kate: I know I know
Kate: its a problem i have
Kate: I don't know why i do it
Kate: my mom is always trying to figure out why i do it
Angela: me too
Kate: I try to stop
Kate: but i can't help it
Kate: its like the german in me just seeps out or something
Angela: at first I thought it was because you studied German so much, but the words you capitalize would be lower case in both German and English
Angela: so I have no idea where you're coming from
Kate: LOL
Kate: I know I know
Kate: its bad
Kate: I do it without knowing it
Kate: its sad
Kate: I myself try to avoid doing it
Kate: but somehow
Kate: they just pop in there
Kate: I even went over this one blog and fixed some of the capitalized words in there that i had
Kate: I must not have caught them all
Kate: lol
Kate: it must be a pirate thing
Kate: I guess I just feel that the things i'm saying are really so important that they must be capitalized a little bit
Kate: lol
Angela: well they won't be for too much longer
Angela: *viciously de-capitalizing*
Kate: LOL
Kate: I think it must be some sort of disorder
Kate: i've never known anyone else to have that problem
Kate: i'm sure if i went to some psychologist for it, they would come up with some new special name for it
Kate: they would bring me on the today show as a new specimen for a new found diagnosis
Kate: " Its the most unbeleivable thing, she has no control over it, she even capitalizes lower case words in paragrahs in her sleep"
Angela: lol
Angela: *corrects numerical-verb agreement* grumblegrumblegrumble
Kate: katy: "I've tried to stop, but nothing I do seems to keep me from capitalizing my words, I even try to stop myself in the middle of doing it and I can't even force myself sometimes to backspace on them when i do"
Kate: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!11
Angela: *grumble*run-on sentences*grumble*
Kate: LOL
Kate: i'm the queen of run on sentences
Kate: infactsometimesi even LIke runningonmywordsalltogetherLIKETHISwith a fewCApitalLetters nowAnd Again where they Don't belong
Kate: I know that sentance there is killin ya!
Angela: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!1
Kate: *watches as angela rips out all the hair she has left*
Angela: *runs for the bunker*
Angela: *clutches "Eats, Shoots & Leaves"*
Kate: LOL
Angela: it'll be'll be ok...Lynn Truss will save the world
Angela: *deep breaths*
Angela: ok
Angela: now look at your post
Kate: k
Kate: wow cool, theirs Space thingys
Kate: LOL
Angela: omg
Kate: no really its beautiful
Kate: thank you
Kate: i'm laughing so hard i'm crying
Angela: *headdesk* when wishing to make something plural, one first REMOVES the -y and replaces it with -ies
Angela: [sobbing emoticon here]
Kate: did i actually do that
Kate: wow i typed that thing fast
Angela: right above, "space thingys"
Angela: lol
Kate: LOL
Kate: seriously the tears are streaming
Angela: right after "theirs"
Angela: *headdesk*
Kate: Ah hahahahahahahahahha
Angela: I'm going to have an aneurysm
Kate: i'm snorting OMG
Kate: omg
Kate: *breaths deep*
Kate: phew
Kate: i could barely see what i was typing
Angela: seriously
Angela: my little brain is exploding
Kate: lol
Angela: must *gasp* fix *choke* homophones
Angela: *thud*
Kate: if we get an apartment together
Kate: i'm just going to randomly leave papers lying around the house with awful grammer
Angela: oh god
Kate: just to watch you freak out
Kate: and start correcting it

Make no mistake, people. I-the jaded, vindictive, pessimist-am the nice one. :P

Single Pirates!

Blissfully Single Kate's Log:

The Picture above was a splendid picture taken by a man my brother and I ran into in Manitou springs after our “Pirate Show” at the Ute Pass Library. I just found his email to me with it attached today.

My little sister and I as of yesterday have had the entire house all to ourselves and will continue to have until the 8th. Its been nice and I’m finding time to work on my book and other things such as this blog for instance :D

The snow has been coming down steadily most all day and has brought much inspiration for book writing and art.

Well off to the drawing board, I have to figure out Christmas gifts and card ideas.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Coming up for air...

to explain a couple of things about decorum. When attending a memorial service, you do not-under any circumstances-wear the same style of make-up or FM shoes that you wear to go clubbing. It does not make you look "dressed up" or appropriately formal, it makes you look like a classless slut who wants to be the center of attention.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Pies, Pies, and more pies :)

Oh so many wonderful things to write about, and so little time!

My family decided to have Thanksgiving early on Sunday, since my parents will be running off to the Caribbean on a cruise with my father’s business. Well I made the pie crusts and the filling for the pumpkin, since I didn’t have time much for anything else considering I had a show the next day to do before our celebration on Sunday. I took some pictures of the pie making process, and had fun doing it!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Still no content

Since the beginning, loners had been out there, on their own, making and doing things. They had kept to themselves, liked their own company,thrived on their days alone. They had produced the Mona Lisa, Jungle Book, Taoism, Walden. How could I have known? In that nonloner world of teams and troops and congregations, who would have said, 'Psst, hey, loner. Here is a grand roll call of your forbears. Protoloners.'
Party of One, Anneli Rufus

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Flying solo, with tea!

From Singularly blissful Kate’s log:

Before I begin an account of some recent adventures and just plain simple good fun and future plans I’d like to address the fact of why my friend and I decided to start this blog. I was going through a hard time trying to figure out if anyone could or had ever achieved true sincere single happiness without dating people and always looking for someone to go out with that is more than just a good friend. All the websites and blogs and advice columns all were directed at helping singles on how to get over a bad relationship and telling them that getting out there and dating again was the thing to do. I just for the life of me could not find one person to just say that being single in and of itself had been rewarding to them and that they were happy living without some sort of romance. I realized I had to discover this on my own and ignore the world and its pathetic advice that it had to offer and discover it for myself. I can’t say I’ve fully accomplished this, but since I started on the quest for happiness without romance I’ve gradually become more and more successful. Once and a while the thoughts of desiring that still linger near, but they do fade the more I venture forth on my quest. I hope to provide thoughts and encouragement to other singles out there who desire the same for themselves in their lives so that they might learn to be happy and not depressed at the thought of being single. I am learning to count the blessings of having a single life rather than mope about the fact that I have no one to share my life with. If I find someone someday that I’ll want to spend the rest of my life with, then great! But in the mean time, I’m going to be happy about being on my own and not attached to anyone and free from the meat market of the dating world.

Now on to my life as a single:

Saturday, I and my brother had two very successful Pirate shows and were told once again that we had a very professional show, I also was informed not only that I have a beautiful voice :D, but that I have amazing expressions LOL! Its always nice to get plenty of encouragement when your embarking on a new endeavor. While no fox news or reporters showed up as was a possible chance, I enjoyed myself immensely (as I usually do with each show) entertaining the kids. Two shows in a row really wiped me out and zapped every little ounce of energy I possessed.
I am looking forward to the Christmas season and will be trying out some new recipes that I’ve never tried before, I decided its time I try something new for tasting this season and not just cling to the usual which I love and feel safe with for holiday comfort. I’ll take pictures of each and every new creation and be sure to blog and post about them all. My sister is coming home from college (where she is obtaining her masters) for the holiday and we shall no doubt have several girl days of pure fun while she is here.

Sunday my family and I went to a little amusement park called “The North Pole” to celebrate my little sisters birthday. I discovered that my little sister is an adrenaline Junky and loves to do as many crazy rides as possible. We had lots of fun on all the rides and ate funnel cakes and felt like kids for a whole day. We ended the day with pizza at a new pizzeria we had never tried before and then Cake, Ice cream and presents at home. To add the cherry on top of the very fun day, we watched one of my sisters presents “Kit” the new American girl movie. Today I’ve been enjoying the lovely fall whether we’ve been having and took a nice brisk walk in the sun and cool air. Now I’m enjoying a nice hot cup of Celestial seasonings English toffee tea with a bit of honey and so concludes my blog for the day/week :D

Monday, November 17, 2008

For lack of content

It is heresy in America to embrace any way of life except as half of a couple. Solitude is un-American. It may be condoned in a man -- especially if he is a "glamorous bachelor" who "dates starlets" during a brief interval between marriages. But a woman is always presumed to be alone as a result of abandonment, not choice. And she is treated that way: as a pariah. There is simply no dignified way for a woman to live alone. Oh, she can get along financially perhaps (although not nearly as well as a man), but emotionally she is never left in peace. Her friends, her family, her fellow workers never let her forget that her husbandlessness, her childlessness -- her selfishness, in short -- is a reproach to the American way of life."
Erica Jong, "Fear of Flying"

Friday, November 14, 2008

Living Life Single!

Our goal is to bring singles into a new mind set and outlook on their single status. Being single is not evil and it is something to embrace and enjoy. We are not against marriage, but we encourage a mindset where one finds inner peace in their singleness and does not grieve over it. Having once been an unhappy single myself, I speak from experience when I say life is fuller and much more beautiful now that I don’t worry about whether or not I will ever marry.

Finding peace in singleness is about finding joy in everything you do have already: family, friends, faith, and career. Don’t let people pressure you into dating, and don’t wait till a spouse/lover comes into your life to do the things you've always wanted. Climb Mt. Everest, swim the channel, backpack through China, make that million you’ve always wanted and help that charity you’ve always wanted to help, if you are waiting, because you’re afraid you'll miss Mr. or Mrs. Right, then chances are, you won't ever get the chance or time again to do it.

When we say single, we really mean single! None of this “oh I’m dating that guy and oh that one too“! No none of that, we really enjoy being blissfully single and live life to its fullest. We both live in two different states and see each other when one or the other gets a chance to travel. Its all really been a lesson in progress learning the real beauty of singleness! Were not against men at all, but find remaining unattached to one has given us the freedom to say, “oh I’m heading off to India in a year”, or for the other to say, “I’ll be studying pre-law in the fall after I’ve experimented with running my own business of doing comedy/musical shows for kids for a bit“.
No emotional drama or feelings getting hurt, or anyone having to worry about offending anyone. We can take off whenever we want, or try out something new if we so desire. I admire those who want to be married and have a family and live that life, there was a time I wanted that too and maybe one day will want it again! I have no problem with anyone who desires that life at all, considering both of our families had great parents who have been married for years and never were formerly married to anyone and will continue to stay married to each other till they die!
Many people rarely get to enjoy the blissfulness in not being tied to someone at some point in time, because the world has tried to convince those who are single that it is a bad thing and that they must date if they are not married. This blog is to tell about our travels, our experiences and our adventures as single women, to encourage other single people out there to enjoy life without a partner of any kind, and to ignore anyone who might try to tell you that you need someone to be happy. We invite you to read this blog at your own risk, and to enjoy our journey with us, as we relate each story about both our lives whether the stories are separate or join up from time to time! We also will put down our thoughts of things past or present happening in our world, and whatever else may cross our minds at any given moment!