Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Pop culture and Singles!

From Blissfully Single Kate's log:

Singleness is only “hard” if you think it is and allow the world to tell you how you should think.

Few films and shows out there actually condone being totally single and not putting yourself on the meat market as so many shows out there encourage.

I am always on the search for a message from any film nowadays that does not condone single men and women dating perpetually and giving their heart out over and over again till pretty much they believe that is all life is about, and that no one person can be happy for a minute without having to be with someone in some capacity or other.

Uptown Girls is a movie that few may realize has probably one of the strongest messages in teaching single girls and guys to stand on their own two feet and stop depending on a relationship to supply them with all the things they think they need emotionally in life. I recommend it for those still struggling to let go of depending on having some kind of relationship to make them feel significant or emotionally satisfied.

There are singles of all ages, but the brainwashing of society starts young. While I like to target all ages, I realize that to catch the attention of the younger ages, I must intentionally speak to them in particular.

While young single girls and guys may think “oh I have it all going for me and I don’t have to learn about being happy single, because I won’t be single for much longer” are certainly walking a dangerous path of thoughts.

There are those of us, who need to get out of the down trodden thoughts society has injected into us since the beginning of our dating years. We have a greater challenge to overcome such thoughts because of the extent of the exposure we have suffered from such a mind set of pop culture in comparison to those who are just now stepping off into such a civilization for the first time.

Being single is not bad, it’s not evil, it’s not wrong, and it by no means says anything about us. Let us determine what speaks for us, not some status that the world has labeled as “OLD MAID”, “Lonely single”, or any other negative connotation that would imply there is something wrong with us.

Rarely do people see a “single” as someone other than someone with a need to be dating or married. What about our character, our talents, our amazing minds? They just go by the way side; because they become attributes and reasons for someone to date us for, rather than attributes that can achieve great things. Let us do great things, and marry that special person when love comes our way or not. The more time you spend in actually achieving great and wonderful things, the less time you have to worry about if you will meet the love of your life or not. How many times have you heard a friend tell someone they should be dating someone based on all the attributes they both have and how they would fit based on that?

While it’s not wrong to find someone with a great mind to date or marry, it just should not be pursued like a hunt for the perfect costume come Halloween.

If finding a love partner for the rest of your life is your only goal in life and if you feel that you are nothing without that, than you have sold yourself short, and will continue down a path of negative thoughts about yourself and those around you. I want you to be happy as an individual and for you to find the success that embracing a single life has to offer before dating again or getting married.

Challenge yourself to find new goals new passions or maybe emphasize the ones you have already over the goal of finding someone to be in a relationship with. Even if the goal is just finding yourself!

If you don’t have friends to surround you, then go out there and find some, if you don’t have family to surround you then find friends willing to be like family.
Singleness does not equal loneliness!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ha,I tend to be on the lookout for those types of films too. One I would reccomend is Bachna Ae Hasneeo, a Bollywood film. Just listen to the third girl in the movie make a statement about how she doesn't want to get married. It made me smile, I'll tell you that.

Anonymous said...

Ha,I tend to be on the lookout for those types of films too. One I would reccomend is Bachna Ae Hasneeo, a Bollywood film. Just listen to the third girl in the movie make a statement about how she doesn't want to get married. It made me smile, I'll tell you that.